Another Damsel in Distress? (Powerful women of the year 2014)

I know that many of us especially young women have been raised on the beautiful and romantic stories from Disney that always begin with a beautiful but tragic female character being imprisoned, treated badly by a vicious step mother or somehow being trapped by her cruel circumstances.

All of these women possess amazing character qualities as well as beauty, so as to make their supposed entrapment seem so unjust and unfair. As she is helpless all she can do is await a prince to come to save her. Her life is suspended as she lives in a tower, or lies in a deep sleep, is mistreated by a mean step mother and she is always unable to rescue herself. 

Cinderella, the sleeping beauty Snow white, Rapunzel with the long hair, the little mermaid Ariel, Jasmine, and Pochohantas all of them can only be saved by one thing, marrying the prince or the male hero in their story and then becoming the princess they were always meant to be. Belle even goes so far as to fall in love with a beast and try to change him with love.

Well I am here to dismiss this untruth for you - these stories are false and have entrapped so many other beautiful and amazing young women of this generation from reaching their full potential, as they suspend their lives trying to stay beautiful and awaiting their prince hero to arrive and rescue them from their circumstances. I want to scream “Wake up sleeping beauty, climb down your own hair Rapunzel, Belle the beast can only treat you badly if you allow him to and Ariel be who you were called to be and stop trying to be someone or something else!”.  

The truth of it all is that Disney created these magical stories from the true origins that are sometimes quite horrific tales of a more realistic nature.  We must teach our daughters that in the real world there is no fairy dust or glass slipper and that we must remove ourselves from people that have evil intentions towards us. There is nothing enlightening about suffering while you wait to be rescued. Not to mention the pressure we have placed on our young men to be a knight in shining armor that is looking for a helpless woman to rescue. Men of today have respect and admiration for strong women that are loving and capable of taking care of themselves.

And yes there are happy endings but they don’t always look like a Disney fairy tale. Sometimes the female character does not get married and instead is the CEO of a large corporation, she does and can live happily ever after if she has encountered her true self and purpose. Or maybe she looks like mother Teresa who lived a life of servant hood and rescued others in rescuing herself. She might be the single mother that is truly a hero for taking the responsibility that was too much for the prince that ran away from it all. What ever her life is she must be responsible for her true happiness and not give the responsibility away to another.

Here are a few links to share the origin and to dispel the myths that we have come to believe via our journey with Disney for the past 8 decades.

http://listverse.com/2013/02/13/10-disney-movies-with-horrific-origins/

http://www.policymic.com/articles/45409/5-shocking-origins-of-disney-classics

http://www.buzzfeed.com/adamellis/super-dark-origins-behind-your-favorite-disney-movies

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/11/12/the-real-story-behind-eve_n_4239730.html

Charmaine 

To My Children- You are my Mirror

The day you were born I looked at you and saw myself in the mirror.

I saw what I was and what I wasn’t, what I had and what I lacked, what I wanted and what I wanted to get rid of in me – Your birth caused the true me to begin to arise.

I let you set the standard and tell me what you needed and when you needed it even when every Dr Spock book said otherwise.

You slept in my bed and I held you close because I knew that our time together would be a short blip in eternity and every moment together was precious

Your tears meant I had a job to do- to find out why they were there and to help you better communicate what your needs were.

When I yelled at you for not hurrying it was because I truly wanted to slow down and enjoy my day.

You didn’t continue with gymnastics or drums because I saw you hated it and I didn’t want you to live out my dream, just to find your own.

I wasn’t set off by you quitting something because the way I found me was by quitting those things that made me miserable and doing the things that I loved.

My need to control was seen in every temper tantrum, especially in the ones I had.

Loud voices that crushed your spirit and jagged words that cut your soul will forever be a mistake that I will need forgiveness for.

Many times punishment, discipline and consequences were my way of showing you who was The Boss- Sorry for not always letting natural consequences teach you. 

The craziness you witnessed was my way of dealing with my own frustrations, inadequacies, tiredness, lack of leadership and brokenness.

I didn’t put emphasis on marks, grades and tests because I didn’t want you to be more concerned with your mistakes than the fact that you were doing your best and that was good enough.

Sorry for the moments I seemed double minded but the world was telling me to make you a success and forgot to give me permission to recognize the true essence of who you are.

For every label that was placed in your pathway, rebellious, lazy, quitter, introvert, bully, ADHD, stupid, mean, bad, sick, I tried to erase them with love.

Whenever I let something or someone else seem more important than you, that was not truth. You have been one of my greatest treasures.

That day in the grocery store when I walked away from you screaming for the candy, I walked very slowly and my heart was calling for you to just understand.

When you took apart our lawn mower I wasn’t more concerned with what was broken than with the fact that your curiosity kept calling you to take things apart and then try to find ways to put them back together- maybe you had a engineers mind.

The reason your teachers kept reporting that you talk a lot during school time is because in my womb that was all you heard for 9 months and from the moment I hugged you into this world I have never stopped talking to you, relationship and communication is a vital part of your heritage.

My job was not to fix you but to fix me and in doing so give you a living example that people truly can change.

I vowed to be a better parent than the ones I had, not being conscious that they were the ones that damaged the tools I was supposed to use to mold and shape you with.

I hear you when you tell me that life is not fair and I am sorry for the times that I have had to reinforce this so you can become stronger, but you have definitely become stronger.

You are my future and the future is found in you, please forgive me for bringing my past into your present and withholding the possibilities of a brighter tomorrow.

I just want to love you and to help you become nothing more and nothing less than the person you were always meant to be.

When you spoke up and told me who you saw me or someone else being, I am sorry if I told you not to be rude and shut down your voice from being heard.

It is true that I am a hypocrite when I tell you to do one thing and then I do the opposite.

I have humbled myself to learn with you as a parent and I still don’t know everything.

Forgive me for betraying you by teaching you to listen to your inner voice and not hearing that voice until you screamed it out loud.

Remember to choose Relationship not Religion, Purpose not Career, Prosperity not Riches, Love and never Hate, Forgiveness not Revenge and embrace who you are in the process.

Every book I read to you was me giving and sharing one of my greatest loves with you.

I forgot that I don’t own you, you are your own person and what you do does not always reflect me, but everything I do does reflect you.

You have been my mirror and I have learned more about myself from parenting you. You each have been one of my greatest teachers

Thank you Mom

10 Tips for an effective Testimony

To witness to someone can also be viewed as story telling. Jesus used stories to relate to people in their immediate situations. By using the scriptures and your personal intimate stories that relate directly to an individual can be a powerful tool when witnessing to an unbeliever or when encouraging a believer. Jesus has commissioned us to be witnesses of the gospel

Though people can deny the truth of the stories in the Bible as they would in any other book, they can not deny the truth about what Christ has done for you personally. No one can argue with you the reality or validity of your first hand personal experience.

John 21:24 This is the disciple who testifies to these things and who wrote them down. We know that his testimony is true.

We are to be led by the Spirit of God when sharing our Testimony, but it would be a good idea to be prepared when you share your personal testimony by gathering your thoughts, writing them down and reading them. This will allow you to deliver your testimony in a clear and concise way when the opportunity arises.

There are different testimonies to be shared. Your personal story on how you came to know Christ is a very powerful testimony. There are also times of personal victory in individual situations that many people can relate to. Healing testimonies build the faith of those that need healing. Provision testimonies create faith for those with needs when shared. Testimonies of signs, wonders and miracles are for the unbeliever to draw them by the Spirit towards God. It is important to be prepared to share the “Hope in you” at any time that the situation permits.

When writing out your personal testimony the following is a good outline

1. Write down your life and attitudes before you came to know Christ. Be honest with the state of where you were, being careful not to glorify Satan. Tell about your home life, your early Christian experience and any people that influenced you as a child

2. Share how you came to know your need for a Savior/ your crisis of faith moment
3. Describe in detail how you came to know Jesus personally. Quote any scriptures that had significant meaning for you.

4. What has happened to you since? Share your relationship with God now.

When sharing about victory or personal experience

1. Share the facts of the situation and all of the difficulties or problems that were present, share your truthful attitude in the situation
2. Explain how your relationship with God and Jesus revealed to you the victory. Share scriptures, prophetic words, dreams, miracles and or any change in your attitude
3. Reveal how God has changed or is changing the situation ( be sure to give glory to God)

Just a note- with victory testimonies you may be required to share a testimony that has not manifested in it’s fullness, but that you have been given victory over in faith. Be sure to edify, encourage and lift up the hearer as you share.

10 Tips to help make your Testimony more effective

1.    Keep it direct and to the point- do not go off about other topics unrelated to your testimony.

2.    Only share important facts and information relevant to your testimony

3.    Do not make it too long in length, you do not want them to loose interest

4.    Be very descriptive and use descriptive words to develop a visual picture.

5.    There is nothing wrong with adding humor to make it more interesting

6.    Make sure it relates to the audience- example change the terminology and examples for youth

7.    Be sure to have scriptures to emphasis your testimony

8.    Give living examples and references to enable your audience to understand

9.    Be sure to honor others when your testimony involves other individuals

10.      Remember Jesus always gets the Glory!

 Excerpt from book-10 Tips for an effective Testimony by Charmaine Hinds 

  

Designer Labels

Gucci, Micheal Kors, Coach, Guess and Versace

Name brands, designer labels, signs of money , status and what?

I am branded, labelled and designed by the greatest Designer the world has ever known

Who are you wearing tonight you ask?

No not DKYN, Armani or Prada, Louis Vuitton, or Chanel

I wear Joy around my neck and Love on my chest

My shoes have the swoosh not of Nike but of the message of Peace

My car does not have a jaguar sitting at the front or a BMW ensign to prove my success to the world

The most prestigious marque can not compare to what He has branded on my soul

My fashion choice is Free, Forgiven and Grace

Christian Dior has nothing in my size

Mercy is engraved on a gold plaque on my hand bag

I am in season and a trend setter, with visions of what everyone will be wearing next

Who did you allow to dress you? – Vera Wang, Ralph Lauren or are you draped in the material of His choosing, in kindness, gentleness and self control, is this Haute Couture for you?

For anything they put their name on can not compare to the way the stars are arranged in such beauty or the colors of the deep blue sea, the majesty of snow capped mountains, nothing ever designed can reach the breathlessness of true creation -A new born baby held in its mothers arms

I have been named after The Designer- I am a Child of God

My luxury items that are priceless consist of wisdom, knowledge and understanding

Cartier and Rolex  have not been bound around my wrist

My times and seasons are in sync and syncopated with Heaven

Though I may not own any Dolce & Gabbana in my closets

 This is not a true reflection of my status

Paris, Milan, New York and  Rome- none have created more of a spectacular show of creativity than when my Designer choose to create me- for I was fearfully and wonderfully made

Crafted and created from the finest cloth, stitched with precision and purpose, displayed for all to see

Runways, models and all the best advertisement and marketing schemes

Can never convince me that now I am worth something.

I was worth it long ago

Worthy of prosperity in every way, body, spirit, mind and soul

Worth all the gold and silver He has hidden in treasures in the earth

Worth His love

He gave me His very best

His Son wore stripes before they were considered fashionable

To show me how much I am truly worth

So I will choose to wear my Truth and be true to what I wear